Choice and consequence OR reward and punishment

I fall squarely on the side of choice and consequence. I can argue for its validity all day. But I see a place for the latter as well.

Earning smiley faces for tasks has got to feel great. And when those stickers add up to a bigger reward like ice-cream or more screen time then it feels like a shoo-in, a fail-proof system of behaviour management.

But I urge you to think about something here. Yes, we want to manage behaviour, but we also want children to learn how to manage their own behaviour and take responsibility for their choices.

How do we translate something that we control into something they can do for themselves as they get older?

In what way will they be able to do it for themselves in the future?


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